"You don't get what you want; you get what you intend."
-Oprah
After a break for lunch, we came back together to talk about intention. Intention is the motivation behind every action. The true purpose or "why" for everything that we do. Ultimately, outcomes are driven by the intentions that we set. You may want to lose weight, but if you don't have a meaningful motivation driving you to that outcome, you will most likely never get there.
In order to set intentions for the year that aligned with our goals, we begun by looking into the past at previous goals that we were unable to achieve. Let me take you through mine: My ULTIMATE goal while I was competing in CrossFit was to make it to the CrossFit Games. I never achieved this goal. If we look at my motivations behind this goal:
-To prove to others that I was successful in my sport after all of the training that I had put in
-To feel accomplishment in my sport
- To inspire others to live healthier lives
I was trying to prove myself to others; I was convincing myself that reaching a certain level in my sport would somehow bring more meaning to my life; I was promoting health while actually living a very unhealthy lifestyle. None of these intentions behind my goal actually aligned with who I truly was or wanted to be. Oftentimes, we fail to reach our goals, because our intentions are not pure.
Next, we took time to think about our wellness intentions for our mind, body, and spirit. For my mind, I intend on furthering my education in order to perform my job to the absolute fullest. My wellness intention for my body is continuing to become the healthiest me I can be through discovering approaches that I enjoy and make me feel good. I want my healthy practices to be those that I feel proud to preach to others. Lastly, my intention for my spirit is to take more time to get away, spend more time in nature, and to remember to reflect on the things that truly matter most in my moments of stress.
Our next topic of discussion was commitment. Now that we all had clearly defined goals and motivations behind them, it was time to turn to the practices we would need to put in place in order to bring these intentions to fruition. I love this quote:
"The commitment to do well and to be well is a lifetime of choices that you will make daily. The space to live in is not 'I'll try.' Not 'I want to.' Not 'I really want to.' It's 'I have decided.'"
-Oprah
In order to make something happen, we have to fully commit to the goal by deciding that this goal is truly right for us, that we are capable of doing the things necessary to succeed, that the time is right for us to do it, and that we are worthy of achieving it. By developing daily, healthy habits that line up with our areas of focus, we set ourselves on the track to a more balanced life. As an example, one of my new healthy habits I have chosen this year is to read a book daily. Not only does this give me time to myself to relax and decompress, but it also enriches my mind.
Another important thing that we talked about while formulating our vision for 2020 was emphasizing the need for rest. Our culture is so focussed on achievement and constantly doing that we very rarely take time to just do nothing. Rest is just as important to success as the actual work we must put in to achieve it. There is no way you can operate at 100% effort forever without taking a break. Even if it's just a few minutes of silence in a room alone, taking time to breathe, reflect, and reset is of the utmost importance to health and happiness. I struggled with this concept while I was training. My thought was, if I'm not training or putting in work to get better, someone else is going to be getting better than me. However, I was running myself into the ground, not recovering properly, and ultimately no longer able to operate at full capacity, because my body was exhausted. You deserve rest. Read that again. Resting does not set you back, it moves you forward by refreshing your mind and body to tackle your goals with full clarity, effort, and focus.
With all of that left to sink in, it was FINALLY time for THE ROCK! If you want to totally swoon and have an hour to spare, you can watch the full interview here. First and foremost, when he walked out on stage, every female in the building was on their feet screaming. This man y'all. He is so inspiring. I'm not sure if you follow him on Instagram, but if you don't, go do it right now. He is the definition of hustle. He owns a production company, is a movie star, was the most successful professional wrestler of all time, has tons of merchandise from action figures to workout clothing to headphones and more, and he recently announced that his new spirits company, Teremana, will launch in March with sales of his Teremana Tequila. He does all of this while being a dad to three girls! The overwhelming vibe I got from him while he was onstage interviewing was gratitude. Gratitude to his fans for supporting him, gratitude to his wife and girls for keeping him grounded, and gratitude for all the wonderful things that life has brought him. I love his attitude towards life, and really want to emulate this feeling of being anchored in gratitude. Even when things are going pretty shitty in life, there are so many other things that we can be grateful for- gratitude is our anchor.
He came to this event after having buried his father only a few days before. It was interesting to hear that his relationship with his father had been somewhat strained, as from what he portrays through his posts on social media about his family, paints him as quite the loving and sensitive husband and father. He spoke a good deal about how he learned from the things that he didn't emotionally receive growing up, to make sure to give those things to his own daughters. This enormous man also emits a tremendous amount of sensitivity. There were several times on stage when he was close to tears, when talking about his late father, when discussing his family, and when talking about all the blessings life has given him. He talked about unconditional love. He wants his daughters to know that his love for them comes completely without condition, because he didn't receive that from his Dad growing up. He wants them to know the value of hard work, to which I think he's nailed down pretty solidly, and he wants to teach them the value of kindness. His outlook on being a father is absolutely beautiful. I believe, setting aside all his success, money, and work ethic, his gratitude, sensitivity, and kindness make him a truly great man.
Dwayne Johnson is a completely self-made man. He came from nothing. His family was literally evicted from their apartment when he was fourteen years old. It was that day that he decided to start building his body, because he attributed that to being successful. He still holds the mentality that he's going to be evicted tomorrow, so he has to get up and go to work everyday. That's where his work ethic comes from. He stays grounded with the memories of that eviction and having very little money growing up. He even named his production company- Seven Bucks Productions- after the 7 bucks he found in his wallet when he failed to make it into the NFL following his college football career. If you care nothing for the sensitivity, the physical beauty, or his love for family, you can at the very least respect the kind of dedication and work ethic it takes to build yourself from the ground up.
One of my favorite parts of the interview was when asked about getting married at 8 in the morning in Hawaii to his wife Lauren, he replied, "I mean, I gotta workout." I feel this to my core. Working out is life. Also, he travels the world with his own personal "Iron Paradise" or massive 40,000 pound portable gym. That is dedication. The gym for him, however, is where he finds solitude. It represents his place for meditation, a way to clear his mind, a spiritual practice even. It allows him to block everything else out and think about all the things that he needs to accomplish in the day. I can 100% relate to this, because I use if for the same purpose. I hope that everyone can find their personal way to find solitude whether it's going for a hike, taking a long bath, meditating in a dark room, or whatever! Find your solitude and clear your head. This is integral to success.
The interview with The Rock was inspiring and wonderful to listen to. He is such a representation of how drive coupled with hard work can amount to the achievement of your dreams. Oprah, like the Rock, begun her story of success from nothing. Her grandmother's greatest dream for her was to become a maid like she had been. Oprah had bigger dreams for herself. Early on in her career, she visited the home of someone who she believed to be the richest person she knew at the time. When she was standing in the kitchen, she looked out the window and saw six beautiful trees. She decided then and there that one day she would own her own house where she could look outside and see 6 trees. Fast forward several years down the road, Oprah is looking out her window counting the trees in her yard. She reached 200 trees, got tired of counting, and hired a tree counter to come over and count the trees in her yard. Her property holds a total of 3,741 trees. The power of manifestation and intention are strong.
Before I get to my word, which I promise I didn't forget about, I want to say that I am super proud of my sister for her word "freedom." She has been a rockstar on her health and fitness journey, losing a ton of weight, and transforming herself and her lifestyle. I have always looked up to my sister and admired her beauty, her strong will, her confidence, and her intelligence. She, like many, including myself at times, struggle with negative self-talk. Freedom for her represents freedom from the negative self-talk, freedom from emotional struggles she's been dealing with, and freedom from the perceived expectations of others. It's the perfect word for her. I hope that 2020 sees all of her dreams come true, because she deserves every bit of success.
It took me all day to get there, but finally, on the way to the car, I found my word: fulfillment. Fulfillment for me means finding the things that matter to me. I want my successes this year to bring meaning to my life. I feel very grateful for everything I have been blessed with. My goals this year are about making an already great life even greater. Helping others through my work is fulfilling. Educating myself enriches my life and brings me fulfillment. Fulfillment also means surrounding myself with family and friends that fill my life with positivity and love. Being able to bring another life that is half me and half my husband would bring me fulfillment. These are the things that I envision for 2020 and beyond- a lifetime of fulfillment.
So I know this is a lot to take in. It was a lot to write. HA. But, now that it's all out there, I challenge you to begin to develop your own vision for 2020. Define your vision with a single word that can set the tone for your goals. As you establish your goals, think about the "why" or the intention behind each of them. Be clear with your intention. Make sure you have a clear motivation behind each goal that lines up with who you truly are. Then begin to put in place daily habits that align with your intentions and lead you on a path to achieving your goals. I would love to hear about your vision for 2020, your word, and your intentions moving forward! Share them with me in the comments section, and let's hold each other accountable in the months to come!